This week is Maternal Mental Health Awareness week and I promised you on my Instagram that I would be committed to sharing my story this week. I was putting it off and leaving the email in my inbox procrastinating. But! I did it! So here it is for you to read and share and find common ground within.
Here's my Postpartum Real Life Story to be shared in June at the Iowa Climb Out of the Darkness event.
Name: Paige Flotterud
Do you have a vivid memory of you in the midst of your PP experience that is a good descriptor of what it was like:
In the midst of my PP experience it was the middle of the night. I had just had my second daughter and my oldest daughter was turning 2 the next morning. Suddenly I was so overwhelmed at what people had always told me about the "terrible twos" I felt as though I could not possibly handle it. What I now know was a panic attack that swallowed me up. I panicked and got in my car in my pajamas and drove an hour to the airport at 1:00AM. Sitting in my car crying as the lights of planes flew overhead. I didn't know what was happening, what I was going to do, or how I would navigate this. Should I just hop on a plane to run away?
What helped:
In my journey. I picked up a paint brush. My therapist had recommended I do something for myself to purposely use a different part of my brain and break the fight or flight cycle I continued to find myself habitually going to. I started painting everyday. Healing came slowly and I soon had a house full of beautiful paintings. Painting the shapes, choosing color, and getting lost in the creative process was a key piece of my journey to recovery. I also found help in medication, therapy, and walking/jogging outside most days for 15 min.
-All my love,
Paige